Toys for Baby

 

Toys for your baby is a topic that will come up very soon if it hasn’t already. Christmas is almost here. Well it is still a couple of months away but if we get down to nitty gritty- it’s only about 8 weeks - give or take a few days. The shops are already starting to get their christmas groove on. I think it is way too early for that yet, however, it happens each year and it seems to get earlier each year.

 

I am a “close to the time” sort of girl with getting things done.  One year I was all organised and had all my shopping done by the beginning of December and guess what?  I went and got more presents because I saw more things that I thought people would enjoy.

 

Those of you who know me well, know that I am much more impressed by the thought that goes into presents and gifts than the price tag. I am a firm believer and practiser of less is more when it comes to presents.

 

It can be easy to get carried away with all the lovely things out there for sale for your little ones. Marketers love babies because they make people buy things.

 

When it comes to toys or presents for your baby- remember your baby doesn’t know about Christmas or birthdays. I don’t mean to say don’t celebrate. Absolutely celebrate- celebrate big- Make it a big, wonderful occasion and let them know how wonderful, talented, gifted, special and loved they are. This is important.

 

What is not so important is thinking that giving him or her more presents or bigger presents means more to him or her than you do.

 

Little babies, particularly, would rather have you to play with than any toy going around. Even toddlers and older children get more joy and memories from spending time with you than when you buy him or her an expensive present. Years down the track, he or she will remember the time spent with you when…

 

So this christmas, bear this in mind when it comes to “spending” for your little ones. Perhaps think about the amount you spend, and what you spend on when buying toys for your baby. Little ones get just as much pleasure from  banging saucepan lids, or shaking a rice filled jar (secured lid of course), or even the wrapping paper may be more fun for some.

 

The type of toys that usually engage your little one more are the ones where they explore and learn. Toys with lots of things going on entertain for a short a time. Toys that last longest are ones that engage your little one. Usually the simple ones last longest.

 

When you are thinking about toys for your baby this christmas, with flashing lights, moving parts, funny noises etc, how many does your little one really need?

 

Our webinar this month covered ideas for play for your baby ages 0-8 months. If you would like a copy of the recording please contact leisa@insyncwithinfants.com to arrange your copy.

Playing with your Newborn - changes with maturity

Playing with your baby is something that confuses and confounds parents at times.  They often feel that  they seemingly just work out what their baby needs and wants and then it doesn’t work any more. The number of times I have heard this in frustration from parents is infinite.

 

Babies mature fairly slowly in comparison to other animals. Animals in the wild really need to mature quickly for survival.  We tend to be dependent on our adults for survival for longer. However that doesn’t mean that human babies learn less or more slowly. Human babies are learning much more broadly and are taking in more than is obvious.

 

Babies routines and behaviours will change fairly rapidly in the first few months. For example, the first day your baby will be fairly sleepy, second day feed all the time and 3rd day milk comes in so babies feed more calmly and less often again.

 

Newborns pretty much only feed and sleep for the first 7-10 days, maybe 2 weeks if you are lucky then start to wake up and let you know that he or she is here.  What used to work often doesn’t work any more for settling and maybe even feeding.

 

Then you work out your baby, get into a new routine and then 6 weeks hits and another change in behaviour. He or she is more alert again, now smiling and wanting to interact with you. If you haven’t thought it before, many parents are now thinking ‘why doesn’t my baby know when it’s time to go to sleep and just go to sleep?’ Because things have changed and you as the parent have to help your baby learn his own body signals and teach him or her what he wants is not necessarily what he needs.

 

One of the things a lot of parents do without knowing it is they tire out their baby with a lot of play.

 

When your baby starts to respond and interact with you more it is easy to get caught up in the excitement of it and miss the signs that your baby is tired and ready for a break. These are often fleeting as your baby gets older and are easily missed.

 

Playtime is fun and one of the activities that you want to enjoy because it brings everyone so much joy. It is helpful to be mindful of watching for that your baby doesn’t get over tired and thus harder to settle because of it.

 

So yes things will change with maturity, however as you get to know your baby more you will be more in tune with him or her and be able to work it out. It will take time and it won’t be a magic answer but you will do it. You know your baby better than you think. If you take the time to observe it will become easier. Enjoy playtime with your baby and bear in mind  those signs that your baby shows to say “I need a break now”.

 

For ideas about signs that your baby has had enough get our sleep ebook- it tells you all about early tired signs. "

When playtime is not needed

Every parent wants to sleep well at night. Critical to good night sleep is setting up really good habits in the evening routine. When your baby is newborn until about 6-8 weeks evenings can be really tricky and hard work. This is normal and is just your baby’s immaturity. The effort you put into a consistent, calm evening routine will eventually be rewarded!

 

The witching hour, the arsenic hour, trouble time. Babies are often unsettled in the evening. Theoretically there are a number of things contributing to these unsettled times. Breastmilk supply is lower at this time of the day, everyone is tired at the end of the day (yes, even after all those naps), and it can be a busy time of the day for the family with dinner, baths, homework, planning for next day and dealing with frazzled temperaments from tiredness.

 

Most newborns just want to be held at this time of the day. He or she may want to suckle all the time. Remember sucking is soothing so this is perfectly normal. This is often called ‘cluster feeding’. All this behaviour will pass once baby matures (in weeks and months, not years!).

 

Once your baby matures past needing constant cuddles in the evening, evening routines can be started. Evenings routines that are helpful include dinner, bath, story, milk*, bed. Once you start your evening routine aim for no playtime. This seems like a drag but can make all the difference in the world to your night time . When little ones get into bed on time and know what to expect things usually run much smoother.

 

When the arsenic hour hits remember that your baby is not complaining that they are bored. Make sure that well meaning friends and relatives don’t try and stop the baby from crying by entertaining and playing. Babies do not need play in the evening. They need a calm, predictable bedtime routine and lots of support to work through the stresses of the day, relax and go to sleep.

Our webinar last month was on being with your baby when crying. If you would like to purchase a copy email us here and we will organise it for you. Go here or send an email to leisa@insyncwithinfants.com

* Remember last week I wrote about feed, play, sleep and not using feeding as a sleep cue? Having a feed just before bed as part of the evening routine is okay. Feeding to sleep usually does not interfere with night time settling. The problem is if your baby relies on feeding for sleep at every sleep time. The one for the evening is okay - enjoy that lovely cuddle time together.

Feed-Play-Sleep

Feed-play-sleep is a parenting mantra that is misunderstood by many! This concept came about to give new parents a framework to help manage their baby’s care and to give some sort of routine to their day.

The concept is for those who really need some sort of structure in their lives to help them make sense of their day (the parent I am talking about here).

 

Most new parents arrive home from hospital with their baby, look at each other and ask, “now what?” Feed-play-sleep is the answer.

 

Basically Feed-play-sleep is a way to separate feeding from sleep for newborns so that feeding is not a strong cue that your baby becomes reliant on for sleep. Babies are learning from birth. The order of their day is something that some babies learn quickly, while others are more flexible.

 

Some babies who learn that feeding comes before sleep can have difficulty sleeping. These baby’s parents struggle to help their baby get adequate restful sleep. Because feeding has become a sleep cue their baby wakes frequently with a short sleep cycle and thinks he or she needs to feed to go back to sleep again.

 

Hence Feed-play-sleep came about to help parents manage their routine for better outcomes for all.

 

Baby gets better quality sleep and learns helpful habits for sleep, gets really good feeds at feed time and is happier. Parents are not feeling like they are always turning around to feed or put baby to sleep.

 

Feed-play-sleep is not something that all parents use or resonate with. As with everything we discuss at Insync with Infants- it is another concept that is available to help you make sense of life with a new baby when lots of things just don’t make sense yet.

 

Feed-play-sleep can be confusing because your baby will not always feed every time he or she is awake. This is the bit that often causes confusion and frustration. As your baby grows and matures, the number of feeds a day often reduces. As your baby learns about sleep separately from feeding he or she will also have some times when he or she will have a short sleep, have a short play time and have a another sleep without the need for feeding. In all of these instances just follow your baby’s lead. As you learn their behaviours it will become easier.

 

If you would like some practical assistance, tailored to you, Insync with infants has home visits or skype consults available to help you with this confusing time.

 

Please email us your enquiry at Leisa@insyncwithinfants.com.

 

 

Playing with your Newborn

One of the things that can be confusing and tricky for new parents is all the toys, helpful tools and stuff out there for newborns and toddlers.  One area that can be really confusing for parents is toys and what is appropriate for play.

 

Newborn babies are wired for survival and learning. Their senses are turned on so that they can learn as much as they can from their surroundings as quickly as possible. Their brains are wired for learning. The tricky part of this is that newborns get overstimulated very easily because of this.

 

This is a really confusing thing for a lot of new parents.  Usually you are so in love with this new baby that you just want to shower  him or her with affection and positive vibes and joy and everything else.  Unfortunately your baby can only cope with a short amount of stimulation and quite quickly get over stimulated which looks like an unhappy and cranky baby.

 

Your baby doesn’t need much at all in the way of toys etc. It is probably more for our benefit to think we need to provide all this stuff. The best play thing for your baby is you. Your newborn gets enough stimulation just from the touch, sound of your voice and movement that he or she receives from the care that you give throughout the day and night.

 

Sure as your baby grows and matures toys come into play more. When your baby is moving around the floor, more interested in surroundings, reaching more etc, toys will be more important. However you are still the most important part of your babies toy room.

 

My message is that your baby doesn’t need all those things that marketing makes us believe  are important. Pretty much less is more when it comes to your baby.  You are enough and the perfect plaything for your baby.